I’m sorry, but there’s something very funny about having a celebrity side absolutely die in the ass. I don’t feel bad about bankrupt celebrity businesses because they’re busy and famous anyway, so it’s not like they’re going to have a hard time getting food on the table. Eat the rich, baby!
I recently came across a comment thread in the official Facebook group of the blind celebrity gossip Instagram account Deuxmoi, which started with a member asking, “Can we have a chat about failed businesses and lifestyle businesses?” from the world of celebrities?
Why yes, we can. In fact, 410 comments on the post say a LOT we can.
Scrolling through it was a real treat, and since the Deuxmoi L’Officiel group is now gone, I thought I would bring you some gold:
Blake Lively’s aspiring GOOP
Gossip Girl alum Blake lively started a lifestyle blog in 2014 and there was a lot of fanfare around him. She even made a Vogue cover promoting the damn thing, but it withstood the instant reaction as it was like Gwyneth Paltrow’s GOOP without the candle charm.
Like GOOP, Lively produced things like $ 1,200 diaper bags and also lots and lots of mason jars. It’s no shock, then, that she has become one of the many failing celebrity businesses shouted in the Deuxmoi thread. The site closed in 2015 with Lively being quite candid about why in another Vogue story: âIt doesn’t change anything in people’s lives, either superficially or significantly. Â»Ouch.
The Kardashian Kard
The Kardashians have got their hands on so many pies over the years. You know the old saying that the devil works hard but Kris jenner work harder? Well, there is a reason for this! They might be killing him, but not all of the family’s start-ups have been as successful as Kylie jennercosmetics or Kim kardashian‘s shapewear.
Britney’s toxic restaurant
Back in 2002, Britney spears was still riding the wave of his iconic 3rd album Britney (think MTV VMA Snake Moment) and decided to open a Cajun themed restaurant, Nyla, at the Dylan Hotel in midtown Manhattan.
The name was a combo of New York (NY) and its home state of Louisiana (LA) and it was launched in June 2002 … to close later that year due, according to, Vanity Show “A mountain of debt and some violations of the health code”. (Some people in the Deuxmoi group said that there were a few food poisoning stories that came out of Nyla). This is the same year that Britney and Justin timberlake broke up, so to be honest, she probably didn’t even notice or care that she joined the list of celebrity business failures with Nyla.
Jessica Simpson’s edible beauty products
God, confession time for me here. I actually owned one of these perfumes released by Jessica simpson in the mid 2000s. Mainly because I really liked the idea of ââsmelling like a creamsicle (?) for some reason. Who doesn’t like desserts? It made sense in my brain that I constantly smelled sugar foods, because then everyone would love me too. Anyway. The bonus here was that all the products were edible! Just in case you smear yourself in Deliciously Kissable Body Shimmer powdered sugar and then get hungry, you know.
Lindsay Lohan’s Mykonos Beach Club
Ah, Lindsay Lohan. We absolutely love the girl, but basically everything she’s touched (aside from her deserving Logie look The masked singer Australia Season 1) of the last decade has been absolutely cursed. Example: his pop-up beach club Lohan Beach House Mykonos, a place that gave birth to the equally ephemeral MTV series Lindsay Lohan’s Beach Club.
Linds entered the hospitality business in 2016, opening a club in Athens before launching the Mykonos Beach Club and a second version in Rhodes, called Lohan Beach House Rhodes. When the TV show was canceled in 2019, it emerged that Lindsay Lohan had pulled out the club as well, with tourists sharing photos of the place looking like a post-apocalyptic wasteland. Apparently a few of its sites are still open, even in these difficult COVID times, but Mykonos is not one of them.
At Fudge, Jessica Biel’s controversial children’s restaurant
In 2016, Jessica Biel opened a kid-friendly restaurant in Los Angeles called Au Fudge with her business partners. EstÃ©e Stanley, Joey GonzÃ¡lez, Kimberly Muller and Jonathan Rollo. While browsing the Insta, I somehow can’t tell Why was it suitable for children? There seems to be spaces for children’s parties so I guess it was just an upscale Macca party vibe.
Either way, Au Fudge seemed destined to join that illustrious list of failed celebrity businesses, as Jess was quite negative about the catering after its launch, telling Jimmy Kimmel on TV in 2017: “The catering is much more difficult than being a producer, âshe said. . “[Weâre] certainly not make any money. Nobody makes money in the restaurant business, in my experience, at least not yet.
Things have only gotten worse for Jessica Biel, with some ex-West Hollywood establishment workers filing a $ 1.5 million lawsuit in March 2018, accusing Jessica and her partners of “collecting tips while on the job. private events and not distribute them to their workers, “according to a report on Today we. The case was apparently dismissed for being “frivolous”.
But a few months later, in July 2018, Au Fudge closed abruptly, with a post on Instagram: âThank you for so many years of support. Tomorrow is our last open day at the restaurant, but more to come from Au Fudge. But as far as I know, there hasn’t been anything from Au Fudge since 2019.
Jeremy Renner’s app
For a while there, apps were all the rage to follow celebrities – the aforementioned Kardashians made a murder through their own, where they dropped news and exclusive content for paid subscribers, a little before Instagram. does not get as big as it is.
Another “celebrity” who thought he was going into the craze was a good old man Jeremy Renner. Bless him, he’s B-grade at best and hardly has much of a cult following, but he boldly launched an app in 2017 as a destination for his legions of fans to come together and chat about all of Jeremy.
According to New York Times, at the launch, he released a statement explaining, “I’m always looking for new ways to connect directly with my fans around the world in our own shared environment.” Fans actually subscribed – for a while – but this article from Stefan Heck for Deadspin explains how dozens of fake Jeremys in the app destroyed it from the inside out after Heck pointed out that all replies to messages appeared to be from Jeremy Renner himself.
“What that means, as you’ve probably figured out by now, is that if you post ‘You look good, Mr. Renner!’ “Under a blurry video of Jeremy driving a dump truck and someone by the name of football_jersey97 responds with” There is diarrhea coming out of my penis “your phone will ring and you will receive a notification with the words” Jeremy Renner: There’s diarrhea coming out of my penis “next to a little photo of Jeremy Renner’s face,” Heck wrote.
âWhat was supposed to be a place for fans to connect has become a place that is everything I hate. My sincere apologies that this didn’t go the way I expected.â Awww. He tried .